Well…

I know I have been slacking on my posts on this shit; I have no excuse for it, yet I need to post more. I just been going through some internal conflicts that I cannot seem to resolve on my own. Yet, I don’t want anyone else to help me.

Remember Johnny? Yea, her… I have been trying to douse the fire within myself that burns exclusively for her; I can’t. I don’t want to keep myself on hold, but I can’t free myself from the spell she has me under. Even when other women enter into my life, something about them is lack-luster in comparison to her. The worst part is that I can’t pinpoint it down to one exact thing. Even females that encompass many of the same qualities that she has, fail in comparison. I’m still venturing down this long and narrow without any kind of direction or guidance; I am terrified. I am on an enclosed course I cannot exit from though, so I must see it through to the end what ever that may be.